Ladies we aren’t the only ones who have them.
As a woman we often forget that we are not the only people on this planet that have feelings. Men have them. We lose focus of that daily when we are trying to manage our lives, our image, and more. Why do we do that? I know we are not all that shallow, right?
Men have been taught throughout their entire lives that showing some form of emotion is a sense of weakness. It makes them less than every other man out there. I know this because my father would never show any emotions, my stepdad says, “Emotions are for weak men.” I sometimes wonder about that because he’s the first to get angry when something doesn’t go right, or cry when my mother puts him in his place.
I often wonder if men sometimes withdraw into their own head? If not maybe into their own heart when their feelings have been hurt. What if someone says something that makes them think and second guess their life’s decisions and they withdraw from that person for a little bit. I ask this because I think I know someone who does this. He withdraws from me when I’ve hurt him. I don’t do it intentionally, truly I don’t. I sometimes think calling a spade a spade and putting it in a way for him to see that playing mind games with me isn’t going to work because I will hurt you in some fashion just like you hurt me by not being what I know we could be.
Yes, I am aware how that makes me sound, totally stupid and selfish. I unfortunately do not know any other way. I want him to see that we could be good together, but when I take a step back and realize that I say and do things that hurt him, it ends up hurting me as well and I leave him alone to be in his emotions because I know he’d do the same for me.
I need to stop treating him as if he has no emotions or feelings just because he does not show them, or is doesn’t have the capability to express them I need to remind myself that he is still a human being with a beating heart that feels things no matter what.
How do we change the idea that men have no feelings? Do we stop challenging them for ours? Do we accept that they are allowed to cry, be angry, upset, ache, and question themselves and their life?
Any suggestions how we make sure that men know it is okay to be emotional? To show and share emotions. To let us know that they too need an emotional break. How do we remind them that they don’t need to carry it all on their shoulders? That they can let us in, let us know what is going on, that we can work on things together.
Let me know.