Funny thoughts

Felt like the Final KISS….Goodbye

Should the Last One be so sweet and yet so painful?

I always ask myself, “Is this one the last one?”, “Is this it?” Because in my mind it’s only a matter of time before He walks away permanently. They always do, right?

Maybe it is really me! I found this picture on Pinterest (Thank You!) explaining to me what a Guy is really meaning behind his words. When he tells you, “I’m not ready for a relationship.” Honestly it could mean two things, maybe he isn’t, or maybe He’s just not wanting to be in a relationship with you. In my life it always falls under the, “I don’t want to be in a relationship with you.” Meaning. Defiantly a boost in one’s self esteem. If you haven’t gone through it, please do so it’s a whole new level of being kicked in the balls.

When you know that whatever relationship you are having with someone is reaching it’s end, can you feel it? Can you tell? I know I always get that sixth sense of feeling in my gut, but then again when a man acts like a child it tends to confirm so much. When you are ignoring someone does it make you feel better? Does it give you peace? When you act like a crybaby when the tables are turned on you because you realize someone can actually play the game of “F*K Buddies” better than you?

That last kiss between two people is one filled with disconnect, pain, regret at times, and even disappointment. It’s like you can feel one’s hope for you on one side, but at the same time there is passion in the mix. Now some people will give each other a final kiss off on the cheek, and walk away. I’ve not known couples to give each other a final kiss on the lips and walk away. Does it leave you with a sense of confusion? It does with me. I know I’m not the only person who’s had to go through that.

I often wonder why someone gives a person the “Final Kiss” goodbye, does it make things easier for yourself? Does it help you disconnect from them? Does it keep them at a greater distance hoping that they will finally get the hint.

I’ve got plenty of experience with those “Final Kisses” it usually includes a side hug, half a smile, and a lonely walk to my car. Being ignored, forgotten, and just dismissed as if I was nothing. Meant nothing to him. Any of the ex’s in the past. Why is that the pain we hold onto when we go back and evaluate past relationships? Does that pain make us stronger? Does it make us wiser? I have some serious fears that all that I am learning will never make things better or easier for myself.

How do we all move forward now that it’s gone? I ask myself this all the time, but when someone comes back into my life, it’s a horrible pattern of repeated pain. Yet, I go willingly like a fool. Aren’t we all fools in love? Hoping to gain that feeling, person, and level of trust in our lives.

Tell me what you think? I’d like to know. How do you give off your “Final Kiss Goodbye” to someone who was good to you, but because of their problems didn’t want to join you down the walk of life.