When the day comes and you finally put your foot down after so many time before saying, “I’m not going to answer my phone.”, “I’m not going to his place.”, “I need to be strong when I am next to him.” The list can go on and on trust me.
How do you look at that person who broke your heart and didn’t give you the one thing you wanted? What’s the “healing” process? Is there one when you started out as a couple, and then because of his issues deteriorated into some false sense of security in the form of sex. Is there a healing process for that?
It’s heartbreaking no matter what, right? I’m just trying to figure that out because in the past I’ve normally set the rules when I knew the game from day one. Letting those go were super easy for me compared to the one that keeps hanging on.
I’m not the type of person who just moves onto someone else. I stay single and alone for a long time. I mean a very long time. At some point I’ll hang out with friends, but stop myself from developing romantic or sexual feelings for guys. Well really any guy at this point because it’s obvious I suck at reading the signs a guy gives.
I was talking to a co-worker today and we were laughing about our type of guys. She was joking about falling for the guy who needs to be bailed out financially every six months, those guys make her head spin with excitement. I told her, “I can probably up you. Send me a guy who is emotionally constipated and has simple commitment issues! Those guys make me want to just ruin myself for them.” We started laughing because it’s the truth.
That’s why I’m trying to figure this mess out. Maybe I just need to give up and be alone, just stop trying to be happy. I mean every time parts of life work better then something is always failing. I’ve never been lucky enough to have it all work out at the same time.
How do you deal? Have you made consensus in your life to just move forward and let something else go? Let me know.