Do you ever wonder how to keep life interesting for yourself? I mean my life is never boring to a certain degree. Do I wish I had some parts of it figured out? Well duh! I’m human, I want things figured out for me, but at the same time I enjoy parts of the adventure.
When I was younger I knew I always wanted to be a writer. A reporter for a local or national newspaper, maybe even a few magazines. I remember when I told my parents that being a writer was my dream. They shot that down so fast, and started getting me Law Books, a set of Encyclopedias, Dictionary’s Webster and the Legal Dictionary. Not to mention I received so many books about the Constitution, and more. They decided what I was going to do because it made money.
I kept writing as a child, into my teens, I even joined my schools paper and was the Entertainment/Cultural Reporter. Giving information about Hollywood and including the Latin Community. It did that before it was cool. I’ll never forget my parents face when they realized what I was doing. Oh man they made me drop the class the following year. I wasn’t able to join any school paper ever again.
When I left for a new school I thought here was my opportunity to make a new start, be a better writer, grow and learn….Nope! I was blocked so hard. It took me literally 15 years to figure out that I was a good writer and that I can do it, but I often wonder if it’s too late to join any newspapers, obviously becoming obsolete, as well as magazines. I still want a fighting chance if I can.
I think because of my many disappointments in life, the many put downs I had I never got the courage when I was younger to stick with writing like I wanted to, here I am facing my 40’s, starting a new job (again) because of this pandemic, (hey I gotta pay bills) and this part of my life, career just constantly takes a hit over and over again. Why is that? Am I paying for sins of my parents for crushing my dream job so early on? Will the universe ever be on my side with my career one day?
As for my relationship life, well it reads like a sad comedy without the romance. Lots of loss, heartbreak and disappointment, but no romance. Maybe that is why I love romance novels, and just read them over and over again, plus try to write my own. I want to express the kind of romance I am missing in my writing. I want people to feel it in their heart.
Is it possible or too late in life to have the dream career? I’m not sure about the dream relationship life….someone who just wants to be with me, who won’t abandon me because I’m different than what they are used to or something.
How do you keep your life interesting during this time? Are you taking the time to re-evaluate your life? Your internal self? Career? Heck even your relationship with yourself and with others?
Think about it and let me know. Because I think my career screwups will get me somewhere eventually, but my love life is dead, and that’s what keeps my life interesting.
Thoughts and Views from Kansas 🌻 