Funny thoughts

Trying to be Calm….

Ever go through moments in your life where you think things are calm and your brain and emotions can take a break? Lol, that’s funny me either. My brain is a constant battle of never ending reminders of my failures. Why do I hold onto them? How do you let them go?

I’m currently at lunch writing this and I’m having a mini stressful moment. I swear I lock up all the cabinets at the end of the day, but I’m starting to second guess myself and my brain capabilities so much. I know I have a tendency to forget things, but when I need to remember them I just can’t.

Why is it so ass backwards? You want to forget about past failed relationships and loves, but remember what you need to do at work. It’s like WTFORK BRAIN!!!!!! Get your s%it together and prove yourself.

I’m going through a lot with my boss. He’s nice, we laugh, and get along at times, but the way he reminds me that I am not where I need to be just sucks. It’s not his fault he did life right. I stumbled through mine and f’d a lot of it up.

I think I’m getting better every now and then, but man when I do something stupid I seriously beat myself up. It’s an old habit I can’t break. Plus I go into mental panic mode where I just remind myself that I’m smarter than this and I gotta stop making stupid mistakes, because it’s just fuel for the fire of being stupid and letting people think I’m stupid.

I will eventually calm down about beating myself up. It sucks, but I’ll get there. What about you? Do you do that to yourself? How do you overcome it all? Please let me know.