When I am going through life’s never ending difficulties why is it when I am in need I am unable to lean on anyone to help me? I always do my best to help others in ways that is within my own capabilities, but when I am struggling I get hit with dead ends and or let downs.
I guess this is why I say it’s best for me to be on my own. I know I shouldn’t allow people into my life like I do, but yet I do.
I often wonder why people tell me to call this person or that person to help me with gas for my car, or something serious going on in my life. Would I love to have someone swoop in and save me to a point? Yes of course! I’m not that stupid, but I know there is no such person like that. Do I wish I could get venmo’d money? Heck yes because it would help, but at the same time I am so used to figuring things out in the end.
I’ve never been able to look for a guy to be the “hero” of “rescue” type to me, but mainly my protector. It’s all I’ve ever wanted in my entire life was to feel safe. Just to know that I never have to look over my shoulder ever again. To know that if someone (I know who deep down) were to come after me as I know they would. The man in my life would be able to protect me from them.
The sad part is out of everything in life. My life to always have a safe haven for me.