Playing the fool

Does it ever get tiresome when you go through life, working hard, you know who you are and what you are all about, but the instant someone gives you attention, your brain and ability to form a coherent word goes completely out the window.

The idea that you’ve worked so hard to built that wall around your life to keep people who want to do harm to you out, makes sense, but when it comes to people who want to be apart of your life you bring that draw bridge down so fast it makes your head spin because you want to keep them interested in you, and more.

Why do we do that? Why do we build a wall up so high for those who can harm up, but not so high for people who are not what’s best for us? I’m totally guilty of this. I have family that I don’t speak to, they can’t break me at all. I have zero emotions for them……however when one person who’s smile, laughter, kiss, and just over all warmth comes around, it’s like those walls don’t even exist.

I want to be loved just like anyone else, I deserve to be loved, respected, appreciate and more. Not too worried about being spoiled materialistic things don’t impress me, but spoiled in an emotional way would be ideal.

How do we have standards for other areas of our life, but not when it comes to matters of the heart, we throw things out the window and forget about protecting what’s important…our hearts.