Do you ever feel like you have to spell things out to someone? You have to remind yourself that it is totally illegal to take a baseball bat to their head for them to even see what you are trying to do. Now, in my situation it normally goes like this: I say something, he knows exactly what I am asking for, yet he just gives me this s&$t eating grin and keeps walking (butt-head!! Yes I said it). Story of my life.
To be honest there is nothing wrong with having that type of relationship with someone, because in reality THAT is what it is…….dare I say it a sexual relationship (say it as a whisper)! Now, the problem is neither side have actually said anything about it. The truth to each other’s face, it’s all been a few hints that have been dropped like some bad pieces of moldy toast. Bad habit I know. Lack of communication works best for us. Putting things on the shelf, hoping that it will just go away because we both know how to read each other (one more than the other), but still there is understanding of needs, wants, desires that are just there. Sometimes it’s also just missing that person. The way they made you feel, smile, their laughter, and really the feeling you get of not having any walls up because the type of relationship isn’t really threatening an anyway. Yeah, all that simple yet mushy crap that goes along with just being yourself in front of another human being.
I mean at times I may have a deep ulterior motive. I kind of do need to get even in some way, but then again I just stop and do the best I can to ignore all of it, because in the end I know it’s all getting set up for failure. I mean there have already been one round of heartache and a few tears shed. At the same time you just can’t help it! I swear I need some crisis center to talk to. I have a therapist, this issue needs to be our next topic of discussion. UGH!! (laughing).
Does it ever get old? Should the need and the desire to have sex with someone, is it meant to be apart of life that is supposed to go away after a while? I’ve heard about that happening to married people, but to be honest I’m scare of that happening to me. Total nightmare thought.
They say women in their mid to late thirties his a new level of sexual awakening. Kind of like a new level of actually understanding what our body is all about, and accepting that just because life is this way or that way, you can still look forward to getting that big O alone or with a partner. Doing it alone really isn’t all that fun, I mean it fills the void when it’s needed, but in reality you miss the heat, the feel of their hands all over you, the endless kissing, and the sounds they make when you are doing something right, and the end result knowing that you just full filled something that the both of you needed. I mean it does feel pretty damn amazing. Right?
Now I want you to think about something. Does it make a man feel less like a man when or when a woman is the one to initiate sex? Does it always have to be the man?
The worst thing about sex I’ve realized is losing interest. How does that happen? Maybe I ask this question because I am not married and I don’t have kids, plus not to mention I’m not really all that busy with my life – in that sense of “Family”. It’s just me and an over weight ten year old cat. Sex is part of life, shouldn’t we all make time for it? Not trying to be funny, but come on! There has to be more to life than just going to bed, waking up, getting the kids ready for their day, doing whatever it is your doing to not have time to have sex with your partner! I get at times just not being in the mood, but honestly do you ever wonder if men aren’t ever in the mood? They think about it often, we women we can control so much if we just add a little sex appeal towards our partner. Can make the torture so much more fun.
Don’t get me wrong I do miss being in a steady relationship with someone. I mean knowing that no matter what I look like he will always smile or laugh at me. My hair could be in a messy bun, glasses on, reading a book or laughing at something on T.V. and he would still want to hold my hand, kiss me like crazy, and want to still make me coffee in the morning before either of us leave for our day. Not really worried if we were going to see each other later on that evening, but knowing I’d hear from him later that day.
Who knows what will happen if and when that day comes where I can experience all that a relationship can or has to offer. I’m looking forward to it. I mean when a MAN steps up to the plate that is my crazy life and existence to want to take this ride with me no matter how long it lasts. To be honest I’m so ready for a Real Man to step up to the plate and make me a priority in his life. Make me feel like I freaking matter. We all want that.
If a guy tells you he doesn’t then he is lying to himself. Men get lonely too, they just refuse to even acknowledge it because they are too busy having fantasies about this woman or that woman alone, when he could have just knocked on the door of the one woman who is totally in front of him and have accepted what they are. Two people who have this odd level of attraction that no one really needs to even understand or give two thoughts about, but are just good together.
Something to think about ladies and gentlemen. Sometimes it’s best to keep what you have than to walk away and miss out on what could’ve been.